On Sleep
Last night I finally couldn't sleep. Usually I am out cold before my head hits the pillow - literally. Often I'm far from a pillow when I pass out for the night, if I'm so lucky to get to sleep for what is defined as a night on something that is soft. When I have a chance to sleep, I do. When I have to work, well, I have to work. I need to be working now and today I'm making a rare exception.
Work is Play
If my work weren't my play, it would just be work and I wouldn't be able to do it, I couldn't justify the time and the many cool things I'm missing out on. My life is very inexpensive. I have nothing to lose if I decided to take a fun, part-time job with the only purpose being to pay the bills and to pay for fun past-time activities. Good thing I can't do that because of my deep desire for fulfillment. I work really, really hard to keep work fun. And by that, I mean I try to stay as on top of things as humanly possible--by working when I should be sleeping. This way, I can look relaxed (usually) and enjoy the company of people when they visit the shop. I think being a relaxing environment and having an escape from the pressure and stress of everyday life is one thing that makes where I work different from almost all others. People feel this, it attracts them to come in and stay awhile.
Fulfillment
A note on fulfillment: The team and I received many thanks for the Vuelta breakfast we served up Monday morning. That is fulfilling. We are directly changing lives and I'm part of the team that is doing it.
The other day, a man who had been crippled for 29 years and has walked for just a few months, came to us for a trike. We don't sell or build trikes, but we were the only hope to this man who could very, very slowly, walk from home to our shop. Jeff, our pro mechanic, built up the trike and we've been seeing this man riding all over town all of the time now. The trike is his new set of legs and it's awesome. Even though I didn't do much directly on that bike, it's hard not to feel pretty good about seeing the yellow of the trike streak by the window.
Cycling and Coffee Combo
Cycling and the subject of it, in general, is an escape. Life is too serious & people take
it too seriously. Life is made lighter with good old fashioned time
with other people discussing topics of relatively little consequence. And, of course, conversations are all made better if held over coffee. I've had many cups of not-good coffee in my pre-RSC life in order to reap the benefits of the conversation that comes with it. So cycling and *good* coffee in one space. Happy people.
Personal Life (?)
I need to spend more time in my personal life and I will be sacrificing my personal physical and emotional health and happiness a bit less this coming year. I've lost a few friends along the way and it saddens me deeply that I don't have more time for those left and for my family who are uber important to me. Recently I closed a door that I didn't have to, but it had "normal good life without time for the work I want to do" written on it and it was taunting me. I prefer not to be faced with the temptation. Some of the sacrifices of the first year have made sense. For two years running, not so much. My attempt is to keep moving toward the nirvana of business: one that is self-sustainable. No one person should be the make-or-break factor. In the business I'm in, I'm a cheerleader. I'm supposed to be a manager, thank goodness my title is curator because that's far more accurate; my personality doesn't go particularly well with manager. I'm not critical to the business, but I think my role is important right now. It will change in time and I hope to get to the point that I don't have to be physically present so much. 12+ hour days standing on my feet (there are more than I can count) will eventually get old and the changes I can make will be smaller. If I'm not constantly changing things, I get bored.
I miss my life some, but not too much. I think if you told me a year ago that I would have only a handful of weekend days off (note, I made my own schedule, so this is purely by choice) or almost no multiple-days off in a row a year ago, I would have died. Now, I've figure out how to enjoy that prospect. I like weekends because of the cool stuff that happens on them - I don't need the weekend. I do need some of the cultural stuff that happens on a Saturday or Sunday sometimes. I need social time away from work, but when I'm away, I need me-time so much more than anything else.
Since I've been in my new life a little over a year, it's given me a chance to look back on it a bit more, even though it's hardly anything to look at since it's flown by so fast. There have been many ups and downs, though so many more ups than downs.
The Glass: It's Full and Bottomless
Being unhealthily positive and optimistic, I somehow turn a less than positive situation into something that can be seen and felt as good. I think this is the only way I've been able to adjust to some of the changes I've had to make to my life.
Back to Sleeplessness
I can't explain my sleepless night last night fully, but I do know that I had time to read 1/2 of a book. I haven't done anything for myself in a long time that has felt so good. Somehow, I wasn't completely wiped out today, though I got further behind than I would have liked. And now I'm wasting valuable time writing this instead of making progress on really important things.
Blogging, however, is something I want and need to do more of, I need to document more of what's going on and what I'm learning right now. It's rich stuff, every single day is a tremendous learning experience. I just hope I'm alive enough right now to really be drinking in this experience and storing away the things I need to accomplish great things in the near and distant future.
The future is a few hours from now, and I'm procrastinating.
Tuesday, September 04, 2012
Saturday, September 01, 2012
Top 10 Reasons Why it's Great to be a Barista
10. Anytime you want a tasty drink, you can make it - any size, any special recipe.
9. No one day resembles the last.
8. Meet people from every walk of life.
7. Get to be an artist - latte art is art.
6. Create something with care and attention to see and taste an immediate result.
5. Not possible to get bored.
4. Learn a lot in a few ways: Talking with customers is always educational. Overhearing conversations is informative, and there is so much to learn about coffee, equipment, regions, roasts, roasting companies, tasting, etc, there's no end.
3. In a position of great responsibility.
2. Make people happy daily. Be appreciated and thanked, probably more than at almost any other profession.
1. Be part of the lives of others. Celebrate with customers as they have good news to share, watch their children grow, hear their stories of traveling the world, listen as they discuss their work, be introduced to their best friends, receive their advice, see their perspectives, make their friendship.
9. No one day resembles the last.
8. Meet people from every walk of life.
7. Get to be an artist - latte art is art.
6. Create something with care and attention to see and taste an immediate result.
5. Not possible to get bored.
4. Learn a lot in a few ways: Talking with customers is always educational. Overhearing conversations is informative, and there is so much to learn about coffee, equipment, regions, roasts, roasting companies, tasting, etc, there's no end.
3. In a position of great responsibility.
2. Make people happy daily. Be appreciated and thanked, probably more than at almost any other profession.
1. Be part of the lives of others. Celebrate with customers as they have good news to share, watch their children grow, hear their stories of traveling the world, listen as they discuss their work, be introduced to their best friends, receive their advice, see their perspectives, make their friendship.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Job Satisfaction
A year ago today I started what I believed to be the best job in the world for me.
Happy to report this is more true today than the day I started. It's been a short year - one that seems to have happened in much less time than a year. A lot has happened, much has yet to happen. For the first year in my life, I am not spending my free time trying to figure out what I'm going to do for the rest of my life.
I've finally figured out how to focus my enjoyment of too many things to accomplish one much bigger thing instead of spreading myself too thin and not making significant forward progress. Everything I did in the past was important when I did it then, and now it's all finally able to add up.
I'm so excited for the coming year: for the challenges that will come, for the cool events that will happen, for the growth to come in the business, for the changes that will take place, for the people who will discover the RSC and those who will make new connections and accomplish their goals through them. For the opportunities I will have to impact each of these and the satisfaction that will result.
Happy to report this is more true today than the day I started. It's been a short year - one that seems to have happened in much less time than a year. A lot has happened, much has yet to happen. For the first year in my life, I am not spending my free time trying to figure out what I'm going to do for the rest of my life.
I've finally figured out how to focus my enjoyment of too many things to accomplish one much bigger thing instead of spreading myself too thin and not making significant forward progress. Everything I did in the past was important when I did it then, and now it's all finally able to add up.
I'm so excited for the coming year: for the challenges that will come, for the cool events that will happen, for the growth to come in the business, for the changes that will take place, for the people who will discover the RSC and those who will make new connections and accomplish their goals through them. For the opportunities I will have to impact each of these and the satisfaction that will result.
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Race Report
As always, when I race, I must report on that race. Racing has to be one of the most fun things to report about and, based on responses by others, also one of the most interesting things to read. I always enjoy reading the stories from my Ride Studio Cafe teammates even though I am left imagining where they're racing as I'm not familiar with the New England races.
Last Wednesday, two days after becoming my race age of 35, I raced in the Witches Cup in Salem, the Massachusetts State crit champ race. Almost every year there's a race on or around my birthday. The last race that I did when I was really serious about training and bike racing was the day before I turned 30--downtown Denver at one of my favorites, Bannock. Eeek, time has flown much too quickly.
Salem is a town I have grown to like through a few bike rides that have brought me there and I did this same race last year. Thinking back, I like almost every small town where I've raced. Maybe it's the adrenaline and happy feelings that come along with the endorphins that endear me to a place after being there to race. This, in conjunction with getting to know people and the place shows its personality and warmth as so many small towns do.
One more reason to race: get to know small towns and places that wouldn't be seen otherwise. Silver City and Salida are both places near and dear only because of races. St Paul is a town I like otherwise, but thinking back to the race of attrition that happened as Stage 1 of Nature Valley Grand Prix the year I was there and how devastated I was in that race, it almost soured me to the place.
Back to the Witches Cup: it's a very fine course that involves only right-hand turns around a large park so it is the perfect venue for racers and spectators, alike. Being a Wednesday night, it doesn't mess up a weekend day and everyone goes out together after the race to have dinner since no one has made plans, which is a typical problem on weekends. The best part of racing is the time after the race, hanging out and enjoying the company of teammates and friends. Racing is super fun, of course, it's just usually a let-down to finish and immediately go home alone. Traveling races are good - so are hours afterward to talk with teammates about strategy, what happened, who did what, etc. Yes, the conversation is hours in duration to be complete and fully satisfying.
My goal for the Witches Cup race was to finish with the pack and be safe. I haven't trained for a crit, haven't done any intervals (though I've gotten in a few hard rides in the past few weeks) nor did I go in remotely well-rested. The pace was reasonably high, though no one tried to make an attack stick. Had they done that, it would have helped raise the pace to something a bit more uncomfortable. The first part of the race was good, though I was pretty concerned about the racers who didn't appear to have good cornering skills. Everyone, at first, was worrying me as I didn't know who to trust. My racing once-upon-a-time found me blog-stalking my competitors. I knew what my rivals had eaten for breakfast. I knew which wheels to ride on and who I needed to worry about at the line. The research was useful. Racing week after week with the same set of people helped, too.
I realized how few people I knew at the race and it feels weird to be so unknown in a situation so familiar. Having good teammates out there was awesome. The warm-up with the RSC girls was really cool. I don't like warming up alone because I often find that I think about the race so much that I get lost and almost don't make it to the start on time. It's also nice to have company for the pre-race leg-openers. Worrying about others' races helps me not think about mine. I offered more advice to my teammates than they probably cared to hear. I like to give good advice and promptly discard it where it comes to my racing. I care that my friends have a fun race, make it to the finish line & feel good about the experience. For me, I feel that if I die out there by working hard, then I've had a good race and I know I will feel good about it. If I play it safe and not everything goes perfectly in the final lap, I didn't get my money's worth. Actually, if I play it safe and do well, I'm still not totally satisfied. Whether I race or not, I love racing and am hooked on it. I know I never have to worry about disliking riding or the sport. I used to guard against that, especially as a cat 3, when so many women decide that racing really isn't for them.
Around and around we went. It's a bit of a blur - though only a 35-minute blur. About 15 minutes in, I was pretty sure I was going to get sick. I'd eaten a bit too much earlier in the day because of pre-race nervousness, but the feeling of sickness was probably due to my heart beating faster for longer duration than it had done since last year at this same race. Fine with me, I didn't have to do a single interval session, my least favorite part of training or racing. February intervals. I used to hate those with a passion and they hurt so badly, it's hard to explain, especially because in February I used to be super fit from a winter of long endurance rides, long trainer rides and lifting in the gym. Still, those intervals....sends shivers for me to think back about doing those out on a lonely, flat, boring bike path to nowhere at dusk feeling like the least fit person in the world as I had to fight to get my heart rate to rise high enough.
I didn't compete for a single prime during the race. That was hard for me to bear. I always, always like to sprint for primes and at the very least give the others a run for their money. For starters, they're a great way to warm up the legs in the race and it's also very educational: how is everyone else sprinting? What's most effective? Who's riding well? And, of course, it is always the time to attempt a breakaway.
But in this race, I was a bit concerned that I'd blow up going for a prime and not be able to recover to continue to race with the pack. So I rode hard, tried to keep good position up front and reminded myself to not do anything too ultra-stupid. With only a few laps to go, I lost position some and I don't exactly know what happened and why. With two short laps to go, I moved up a lot, pretty close to the front. The pace was fiery as people positioned. On the last lap, a crash happened to my left and it spread across the street. I had to ride around it to avoid it so that messed up the finish a bit. When that crash happened, all I could think about was how silly it would be to be broken because of a crash and not be able to be fully functional at work. I used to type for a living, now I need to be able to stand on my feet for 12+ hours some days. When I get (hopefully much) older and naturally less mobile, I look forward to going back to being a computer geek, but now I'm eating up the chance to be active during the day at work.
The final result? 15/44 and it felt great once it was over. Reminded me what it is to race, how fun it is and how possible it is to return to the sport (so unlike tennis or soccer, two sports I used to adore but can't participate in any longer, don't get me on a rant about that). Doing it as part of the Ride Studio Cafe team really added to the experience. Having guys out there represented in the other races was great and sharing in the experience with everyone at the Sul Posto really enhanced the time spent out there during the evening.
Well, I raced. Once ought to do it this year. As fun as it was, I'm really very happy to continue to spend weekends doing the job I adore and living vicariously from the race reports and stories of others. I've discovered so many kinds of riding (off-road dirt for the cx bike and going out at night) that I enjoy so much that spending this time doesn't leave me wishing I were racing. Even if time permitted, I'm not sure I would race more. Okay, I probably would, but that's because it's the thoughtless solution to what, for me, would possibly be an otherwise dull weekend.
There it is, one race, one race report sized for a full season of racing. So, Witches Cup next year? Maybe it's time to start racing masters. Or, maybe it's time for track so I can get my sprint back. Then again, racing is a distraction from much bigger goals I have for my life that I won't achieve if I'm distracted. When will there ever be enough time for both?
 |
| Photo courtesy of Jay Robbins. Photo missing teammates Joy & Mo, we had a great showing at the race. |
Salem is a town I have grown to like through a few bike rides that have brought me there and I did this same race last year. Thinking back, I like almost every small town where I've raced. Maybe it's the adrenaline and happy feelings that come along with the endorphins that endear me to a place after being there to race. This, in conjunction with getting to know people and the place shows its personality and warmth as so many small towns do.
 |
| Time before the race with Erin & Cindy. |
One more reason to race: get to know small towns and places that wouldn't be seen otherwise. Silver City and Salida are both places near and dear only because of races. St Paul is a town I like otherwise, but thinking back to the race of attrition that happened as Stage 1 of Nature Valley Grand Prix the year I was there and how devastated I was in that race, it almost soured me to the place.
Back to the Witches Cup: it's a very fine course that involves only right-hand turns around a large park so it is the perfect venue for racers and spectators, alike. Being a Wednesday night, it doesn't mess up a weekend day and everyone goes out together after the race to have dinner since no one has made plans, which is a typical problem on weekends. The best part of racing is the time after the race, hanging out and enjoying the company of teammates and friends. Racing is super fun, of course, it's just usually a let-down to finish and immediately go home alone. Traveling races are good - so are hours afterward to talk with teammates about strategy, what happened, who did what, etc. Yes, the conversation is hours in duration to be complete and fully satisfying.
 |
| Photo courtesy Russ Campbell |
I realized how few people I knew at the race and it feels weird to be so unknown in a situation so familiar. Having good teammates out there was awesome. The warm-up with the RSC girls was really cool. I don't like warming up alone because I often find that I think about the race so much that I get lost and almost don't make it to the start on time. It's also nice to have company for the pre-race leg-openers. Worrying about others' races helps me not think about mine. I offered more advice to my teammates than they probably cared to hear. I like to give good advice and promptly discard it where it comes to my racing. I care that my friends have a fun race, make it to the finish line & feel good about the experience. For me, I feel that if I die out there by working hard, then I've had a good race and I know I will feel good about it. If I play it safe and not everything goes perfectly in the final lap, I didn't get my money's worth. Actually, if I play it safe and do well, I'm still not totally satisfied. Whether I race or not, I love racing and am hooked on it. I know I never have to worry about disliking riding or the sport. I used to guard against that, especially as a cat 3, when so many women decide that racing really isn't for them.
 |
| Photo courtesy Russ Campbell |
I didn't compete for a single prime during the race. That was hard for me to bear. I always, always like to sprint for primes and at the very least give the others a run for their money. For starters, they're a great way to warm up the legs in the race and it's also very educational: how is everyone else sprinting? What's most effective? Who's riding well? And, of course, it is always the time to attempt a breakaway.
But in this race, I was a bit concerned that I'd blow up going for a prime and not be able to recover to continue to race with the pack. So I rode hard, tried to keep good position up front and reminded myself to not do anything too ultra-stupid. With only a few laps to go, I lost position some and I don't exactly know what happened and why. With two short laps to go, I moved up a lot, pretty close to the front. The pace was fiery as people positioned. On the last lap, a crash happened to my left and it spread across the street. I had to ride around it to avoid it so that messed up the finish a bit. When that crash happened, all I could think about was how silly it would be to be broken because of a crash and not be able to be fully functional at work. I used to type for a living, now I need to be able to stand on my feet for 12+ hours some days. When I get (hopefully much) older and naturally less mobile, I look forward to going back to being a computer geek, but now I'm eating up the chance to be active during the day at work.
The final result? 15/44 and it felt great once it was over. Reminded me what it is to race, how fun it is and how possible it is to return to the sport (so unlike tennis or soccer, two sports I used to adore but can't participate in any longer, don't get me on a rant about that). Doing it as part of the Ride Studio Cafe team really added to the experience. Having guys out there represented in the other races was great and sharing in the experience with everyone at the Sul Posto really enhanced the time spent out there during the evening.
Well, I raced. Once ought to do it this year. As fun as it was, I'm really very happy to continue to spend weekends doing the job I adore and living vicariously from the race reports and stories of others. I've discovered so many kinds of riding (off-road dirt for the cx bike and going out at night) that I enjoy so much that spending this time doesn't leave me wishing I were racing. Even if time permitted, I'm not sure I would race more. Okay, I probably would, but that's because it's the thoughtless solution to what, for me, would possibly be an otherwise dull weekend.
There it is, one race, one race report sized for a full season of racing. So, Witches Cup next year? Maybe it's time to start racing masters. Or, maybe it's time for track so I can get my sprint back. Then again, racing is a distraction from much bigger goals I have for my life that I won't achieve if I'm distracted. When will there ever be enough time for both?
Monday, August 13, 2012
Inspire me Rock
Did you have a Pet Rock? I'm trying to remember why I did have one as a kid & I think a lot of kids had one. Mine had a face on it and I know I still have it somewhere safe.
The other day I was on a birthday bike ride on the North Shore (primarily in Gloucester), a place that is remarkable to me and I'd only driven through once before. The ride was full of discovering delightful places sitting on water, the roads wound in and out allowing for nice views and then swept through quiet forests that I wouldn't expect to see so close to ocean water. It was vacation.
One of the woods was full of large boulders inscribed with words of inspiration, paid for by Roger Babson in 1930.
It was a large investment for this man to chisel inspiration in these rocks in the Dogtown woods. He had 24 mottos inscribed in these rocks in 1930, it sounds like it was a job creation program for people who needed the work and it gave him satisfaction.
There are words that are motivational and, silly as it may sound, when I hear them, inspire me and make me think about where I am, where I'm going and why I do what I do. It must exist for everyone to some degree. Maybe not words but smells, sounds, feelings, something that makes the heart pound faster and internally incite some small fire of internal motivation without there being anything in reality to be motivated about.
Since it was my birthday and on my birthday, I go in search of something to inspire that year of my life, these rocks were well-placed. There were things written all over that afternoon and evening to make me think so picking one that is most appropriate for my 35th year was not as obvious as it has been for many other years. Interesting, I think I see where this is going.
Choose. Picking and choosing what to do, what's important and what's not is one of the most vital pieces to success this year. It always is, but I believe that it will play a large role in the coming year's progress. That'll be one inscription for my boulder.
Other words that make my heart beat faster that I'd inscribe in a large, immovable object for the ages:
Creativity.
Passion.
Like Babson, I have to copy his "Ideas."
Innovation.
Entrepreneurship.
Build.
Create.
Dream.
Smile.
Imagine.
Love.
Together, these are what my life is all about and keep me going. I will be trying harder this year than ever to follow the path that winds me around these boulders. With any luck, I will end up in a place no different than where the ride Monday night ended up: in a peaceful place watching the world's most beautiful sunset accompanied by someone special. In the interim, before the sunset, there's nothing I want more than to have created something that I'm passionate about in a creative, innovative way. Smiling through the difficulties to achieve a dream, making the impossible a reality and sharing in the joys and challenges of the journey with someone.
Full speed ahead.
The other day I was on a birthday bike ride on the North Shore (primarily in Gloucester), a place that is remarkable to me and I'd only driven through once before. The ride was full of discovering delightful places sitting on water, the roads wound in and out allowing for nice views and then swept through quiet forests that I wouldn't expect to see so close to ocean water. It was vacation.
One of the woods was full of large boulders inscribed with words of inspiration, paid for by Roger Babson in 1930.
It was a large investment for this man to chisel inspiration in these rocks in the Dogtown woods. He had 24 mottos inscribed in these rocks in 1930, it sounds like it was a job creation program for people who needed the work and it gave him satisfaction.
There are words that are motivational and, silly as it may sound, when I hear them, inspire me and make me think about where I am, where I'm going and why I do what I do. It must exist for everyone to some degree. Maybe not words but smells, sounds, feelings, something that makes the heart pound faster and internally incite some small fire of internal motivation without there being anything in reality to be motivated about.
Since it was my birthday and on my birthday, I go in search of something to inspire that year of my life, these rocks were well-placed. There were things written all over that afternoon and evening to make me think so picking one that is most appropriate for my 35th year was not as obvious as it has been for many other years. Interesting, I think I see where this is going.
Choose. Picking and choosing what to do, what's important and what's not is one of the most vital pieces to success this year. It always is, but I believe that it will play a large role in the coming year's progress. That'll be one inscription for my boulder.
Other words that make my heart beat faster that I'd inscribe in a large, immovable object for the ages:
Creativity.
Passion.
Like Babson, I have to copy his "Ideas."
Innovation.
Entrepreneurship.
Build.
Create.
Dream.
Smile.
Imagine.
Love.
Together, these are what my life is all about and keep me going. I will be trying harder this year than ever to follow the path that winds me around these boulders. With any luck, I will end up in a place no different than where the ride Monday night ended up: in a peaceful place watching the world's most beautiful sunset accompanied by someone special. In the interim, before the sunset, there's nothing I want more than to have created something that I'm passionate about in a creative, innovative way. Smiling through the difficulties to achieve a dream, making the impossible a reality and sharing in the joys and challenges of the journey with someone.
Monday, July 30, 2012
Moving Day
Tomorrow is moving day and I don't know where to begin. I hardly have anything as most of what I own was able to fit inside a regular car when I moved out here. There was a nice little IKEA splurge once I got to town, but other than that, I haven't added much. Somehow, though, the job is daunting.
Part of moving is simply the hauling of stuff down and up stairs many, many times. This part is enjoyable when I'm moving other people's stuff. For my own, it's more tiring as stuff -material items- is tiring and I have to worry about each thing being put in the proper place. It is a good workout and that will be welcome. Stuff weighs a person down in so many ways. My stuff is certainly no exception albeit fairly well chiseled down to the essentials considering how many times I've had to move it. Each time I've gotten a bit more particular about what's important and what can stay back.
The other part of moving is the emotional side. As much as I don't like the old carpet in my current room, it is the space I've started to associate with being my space. I really believe that every human being needs some space, no matter how small, of their very own. This room has, gradually, become my space and now I'm preparing to say goodbye to it. Earlier this year, when I moved to MA, I was trying to nest, it was something I needed. Now, not so much though I'm not sure why.
I remember writing back when I was living in Italy that I enjoyed having roommates and that I never wanted to live alone again. Having roommates here has been a highlight of my current living situation. After a long day, I always can sit down, eat dinner and have a simple exchange about the day or something random. It's a pseudo family. I'm moving to another shared housing situation but I have more private space. I may like living with others but I always think back to when I lived alone, I miss that space and time so much.
Then again, I'm the sort of person who likes to change things up regularly. I don't like changing up people but I do situations.
Time to make a change yet again. Where's my nest and how can I get there?
Part of moving is simply the hauling of stuff down and up stairs many, many times. This part is enjoyable when I'm moving other people's stuff. For my own, it's more tiring as stuff -material items- is tiring and I have to worry about each thing being put in the proper place. It is a good workout and that will be welcome. Stuff weighs a person down in so many ways. My stuff is certainly no exception albeit fairly well chiseled down to the essentials considering how many times I've had to move it. Each time I've gotten a bit more particular about what's important and what can stay back.
The other part of moving is the emotional side. As much as I don't like the old carpet in my current room, it is the space I've started to associate with being my space. I really believe that every human being needs some space, no matter how small, of their very own. This room has, gradually, become my space and now I'm preparing to say goodbye to it. Earlier this year, when I moved to MA, I was trying to nest, it was something I needed. Now, not so much though I'm not sure why.
I remember writing back when I was living in Italy that I enjoyed having roommates and that I never wanted to live alone again. Having roommates here has been a highlight of my current living situation. After a long day, I always can sit down, eat dinner and have a simple exchange about the day or something random. It's a pseudo family. I'm moving to another shared housing situation but I have more private space. I may like living with others but I always think back to when I lived alone, I miss that space and time so much.
Then again, I'm the sort of person who likes to change things up regularly. I don't like changing up people but I do situations.
Time to make a change yet again. Where's my nest and how can I get there?
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Life on New Skinny Tires
Life just got a whole lot more interesting, at least where it comes to my bike riding life. I'd blogged months ago about my future new road bike. That bike just came to life.
In the words of someone else, it's "so awesome it's ridiculous." I totally agree.
Now I've ridden it for 130 miles and have loved every moment of it. Monday's ride to Beverly was some good quality time to be alone with it. Listen to how it quietly rolls along, even when it's hitting potholes. It is the ultimate bike. How can it get any better than this? It was built from the best material ever, created in the next town over by people who are true craftspeople, artists, creators. It was designed by the best. It's Ride Studio Cafe branded. RSC is a place that has been near and dear to me from the moment I stepped in the door last February, a time that feels like years ago in my familiarity of it yet like yesterday in my avidity for it.
The particulars of the bike have been detailed elsewhere, but for now, I wanted to capture this moment for the archives. This, the magical moment in time when the paint is perfect, the bike rides perfectly and all I want to do is be on it riding.
Take a look of all of its photos, too!
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Goal Oriented
Yesterday's goal: QOM on Strawberry Hill. Ooooh, the pang of could-have-would-have-if-only at 1 second off from the QOM:
I think I get why I like to race - it's so much easier to set a goal and reach it than any of the others I set in life and work. Really, going hard and hurting on a hill is easier than many other things. So now to translate that kind of competitive spirit to the rest of my life... Time at this point is a major limiter and it's very frustrating to not be able to do what I need to because I can't get enough uninterrupted time to accomplish anything.
I think I get why I like to race - it's so much easier to set a goal and reach it than any of the others I set in life and work. Really, going hard and hurting on a hill is easier than many other things. So now to translate that kind of competitive spirit to the rest of my life... Time at this point is a major limiter and it's very frustrating to not be able to do what I need to because I can't get enough uninterrupted time to accomplish anything.
Monday, July 09, 2012
What's Your Time Worth?
Last week I was confronted with a question: how much is my time worth? The way in which the question was presented hit me between the eyes and it was relevant to the discussion. This discussion had to do with how much would it be worth to me (paid in $ off of rent) to drive an elderly man to the grocery store, to doctor appointments, etc. The concept is a good one, having the conversation was not ridiculous. However, when put to me as how much it be worth to me to make a trip, say, to the grocery store to take someone shopping, I had to close my eyes, and respectfully ask that the conversation end.
Writing this small entry has some value in that putting things on "paper" helps me form thoughts and sort through issues. However, I should be hypercritical of the time this is taking at this moment and spend my time elsewhere. 10 minutes longer, then on to the next thing.
The answer to the question: my free time, the time I don't have planned, scheduled or otherwise committed is so small it's worth a premium that isn't payable monetarily.
The answer for anyone else: It doesn't matter what a person's salary is, though a contract employee might be able to point to an hour and say it costs $100 billable to a client. Still, would it be worth $100 or even $500 to lose the last moments of relaxation in a week? It comes down to quantity of free time and how much of it there is. Free time = rejuvenation time. It's the time that allows one to do well in the rest of life. Recharging and resting is as important as pushing forward on whatever it is that one does. It's just like racing. One gets stronger during rest and recovery times, but it's the training that lets the rest feel really good (and make one stronger). No champion has ever been made out of someone who trains continuously and never takes a break.
In the real world, I'd translate this to working very, very hard and then sleeping a reasonable amount, having some non-pressured waking moments and then working very hard again. This is my ideal that I'm striving for.
Still looking to find the balance, exactly, but feeling it's a bit better now than a few weeks ago... to be continued, 10 minutes is up and it's time to read something useful.
What's your time worth? Can you put a price on it?
Writing this small entry has some value in that putting things on "paper" helps me form thoughts and sort through issues. However, I should be hypercritical of the time this is taking at this moment and spend my time elsewhere. 10 minutes longer, then on to the next thing.
The answer to the question: my free time, the time I don't have planned, scheduled or otherwise committed is so small it's worth a premium that isn't payable monetarily.
The answer for anyone else: It doesn't matter what a person's salary is, though a contract employee might be able to point to an hour and say it costs $100 billable to a client. Still, would it be worth $100 or even $500 to lose the last moments of relaxation in a week? It comes down to quantity of free time and how much of it there is. Free time = rejuvenation time. It's the time that allows one to do well in the rest of life. Recharging and resting is as important as pushing forward on whatever it is that one does. It's just like racing. One gets stronger during rest and recovery times, but it's the training that lets the rest feel really good (and make one stronger). No champion has ever been made out of someone who trains continuously and never takes a break.
In the real world, I'd translate this to working very, very hard and then sleeping a reasonable amount, having some non-pressured waking moments and then working very hard again. This is my ideal that I'm striving for.
Still looking to find the balance, exactly, but feeling it's a bit better now than a few weeks ago... to be continued, 10 minutes is up and it's time to read something useful.
What's your time worth? Can you put a price on it?
Friday, July 06, 2012
Independence
Yesterday was the 4th of July. For some reason, the 4th has always somehow stood out to me - what I was doing on that day. I remember so vividly the year when, before the fireworks were going to go off, that my mom was reading an electronics book to my brother and me. My thoughts at the time had to do with how much I despised that book. Now I wish I had listened and not wasted energy on not listening. Almost every year, I remember the evening as a warm one, one that doesn't ever seem to end and smells of BBQ. Yesterday was all of those wonderful things minus the good-smelling smoking grill. Yesterday will stand out to me for years to come. I was stoked to be out pedaling dirt trails not far from here, feeling free, happy and absolutely content with life. I need nothing more than that.
In more recent years, the "independence" part of the day has been something that means more. We're independent as people, free in most things. I frequently think about the freedoms in this life and appreciate them. I have exercised my independence a bit more than most since I graduated from college, though within responsible limits. Independence day is one more day when I really like to think about being independent. What do I do and why? There is a solidly good reason behind everything I do, as non-apparent as it may seem to others taking a look in from a distance. Purely from decisions I have made do I live. I am completely independent though it may appear very differently.
After just saying I need nothing more, I have decided to move. Would I move if I were perfectly content? What is the definition of having more? I can be content, but I can choose not to be, as well. I haven't been completely comfortable where I've lived since I moved in. Trying to pinpoint what, exactly, it is that has kept me feeling unsettled here is impossible. I wish I could explain it to my housemates. There's a good chance it's that I'm living in the suburbs, off the beaten path. I like being where people are. Truth be told, I get energy being around people but more so when I'm not part of the conversation. I like to listen as an an observer, not necessarily a contributor influencing the direction of the discussion. One the coolest things about the new place is its proximity to public transportation and a big road. It's access to Boston that I don't have now. Independence from my car is one the things I value most, though I don't actively try to rid myself of it. I just want to know I'd survive if it decided not to start one morning. Being free of stress in my personal life is pretty much the most important thing to me. I thrive on a bit of stress and adrenaline at all other times of the day. There is a place where I need to be free of that.
Back to people and the behaviors of people. I've never known so many people in my life considering computer work typically involved the same 5-10 people on any given day. Being around this many people on a daily basis is very new to me, still. It's a game to me to try to figure out when it's going to be busy at work. When will it be quiet and how do the weather patterns affect people's coffee-drinking and bike-buying interest? On the 4th of July, it was a rainy morning and usually rainy mornings mean people drink more milk-heavy drinks. But on the 4th, they were drinking more cold brew coffee than ever. Was it merely psychological, the idea that it's the 4th and therefore hot no matter the temperature outside? I'd like to know what was going on at local ice cream establishments. I know I wanted ice cream yesterday. I'm programmed.
Tomorrow morning is coming fast. I'd hoped to start the day at sunrise as most days that start at that hour (4-4:15) are my best. What's coming tomorrow? Friday and the "start" to my work week as my Fridays often feel to me the way Mondays used to. This moment in time captured, finally, time to get going on to the next thing to move forward.
In more recent years, the "independence" part of the day has been something that means more. We're independent as people, free in most things. I frequently think about the freedoms in this life and appreciate them. I have exercised my independence a bit more than most since I graduated from college, though within responsible limits. Independence day is one more day when I really like to think about being independent. What do I do and why? There is a solidly good reason behind everything I do, as non-apparent as it may seem to others taking a look in from a distance. Purely from decisions I have made do I live. I am completely independent though it may appear very differently.
After just saying I need nothing more, I have decided to move. Would I move if I were perfectly content? What is the definition of having more? I can be content, but I can choose not to be, as well. I haven't been completely comfortable where I've lived since I moved in. Trying to pinpoint what, exactly, it is that has kept me feeling unsettled here is impossible. I wish I could explain it to my housemates. There's a good chance it's that I'm living in the suburbs, off the beaten path. I like being where people are. Truth be told, I get energy being around people but more so when I'm not part of the conversation. I like to listen as an an observer, not necessarily a contributor influencing the direction of the discussion. One the coolest things about the new place is its proximity to public transportation and a big road. It's access to Boston that I don't have now. Independence from my car is one the things I value most, though I don't actively try to rid myself of it. I just want to know I'd survive if it decided not to start one morning. Being free of stress in my personal life is pretty much the most important thing to me. I thrive on a bit of stress and adrenaline at all other times of the day. There is a place where I need to be free of that.
Back to people and the behaviors of people. I've never known so many people in my life considering computer work typically involved the same 5-10 people on any given day. Being around this many people on a daily basis is very new to me, still. It's a game to me to try to figure out when it's going to be busy at work. When will it be quiet and how do the weather patterns affect people's coffee-drinking and bike-buying interest? On the 4th of July, it was a rainy morning and usually rainy mornings mean people drink more milk-heavy drinks. But on the 4th, they were drinking more cold brew coffee than ever. Was it merely psychological, the idea that it's the 4th and therefore hot no matter the temperature outside? I'd like to know what was going on at local ice cream establishments. I know I wanted ice cream yesterday. I'm programmed.
Tomorrow morning is coming fast. I'd hoped to start the day at sunrise as most days that start at that hour (4-4:15) are my best. What's coming tomorrow? Friday and the "start" to my work week as my Fridays often feel to me the way Mondays used to. This moment in time captured, finally, time to get going on to the next thing to move forward.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)